Jan 30, 2014

The End of First Semester (and other devastating tales)

Wow I haven't posted here in way, way too fucking long. What's happened since the beginning of November? Fuck, I can hardly remember November at all, it feels like forever ago. Let's see what I can get down here.


I had a Sleep Not with my Rangers group, so that was fun. We stayed up all night, as the title suggests. We made pine cone wreaths for Christmas, and did up this totally fucking ridiculous music video to Ke$ha's Your Love is My Drug using some dolls that were lying around (we were staying in a church basement's children's room). At around three in the morning, we took a trip to the Tim Hortons down the street, and boy was that an experience. We expected it to be a ghost town that late at night/early in the morning, but the place was hopping with adults who had migrated from the 40+ dance club across the street. My entire troop was terrified, to be honest. This was not what we were expecting. They got so loud at one point that the lady working the drive through had to yell at them to quiet down or she'd kick them out. We ordered our shit and left.

That's the last event I've gone to with Rangers. I think I went to another meeting after that, but for all of December I was too swamped with school work and health concerns to attend any meetings, or the winter camp. More on that later.

Somewhere in either late November or early December was a fundraiser for Arts Council, this time at a yogurt place across the street. Rose had a poetry station set up. She had people give her a topic, and wrote poetry on-the-spot. It was a nice evening.

December brought school work, school work, and more school work. Lots if ISUs. I handed in a lot of stuff late. My motivation to do anything productive was in the negatives, and still is, but hopefully it'll get a little better now, since my second semester should be a breeze (again, more on that later). I missed a weekend long camp with Rangers due to aforementioned homework and health concerns. I've developed a circulation problem. When I get cold, or my extremities are exposed to cold, they turn white and go numb. Sometimes they go purple, but that's usually when they're thawing after being numb for a long time. That and my joint problems, the source of my circulation problems, are a part of what kept me home from camp. I have been diagnosed with possible lupus, which means that there are signs of it developing but nothing's serious yet. Lupus causes chronic joint pain and nasty rashes if you stay in direct sunlight for too long, especially without protection. If you stay out in the sun for too long, you end up in the hospital. Nobody's actually told me why the fuck you end up in the hospital, but I'm just going to avoid staying out in the sun too long 'cause I don't want to find out the hard way. It's not definite yet, but I'm on a preventative that's helping a lot with the joint pain and hopefully it will stop it from developing any further.

December. School projects. Cold. Joint pain. Numb fingers. Shit. Yeah.

Christmas break didn't exactly bring any solace. My English ISU was late, so I had to finish it over the holidays. And the holidays were kind of a fucking mess.

Depending on where you are in the world, you may or may not have heard about the massive power outages sweeping the greater Toronto area and other parts of Canada around Christmas time. I had no power for three days, from the 22nd to the 24th. I can't remember what time I lost power on the 22nd, it was some time in the evening, but we had almost exactly one hour of power from 12:30 to 1:30 on the 23rd, and then we were out until noon-ish the next day. Merry fucking Christmas everyone!

Christmas itself was nice. Christmas Eve at my nanna's was swell, chilling with my cousins and such. Christmas day was at my Grandma's. My cousin is an asshole (the one who misinformed me about my grandma's opinion of homosexuality). What else is new.

I guess I gotta do the obligatory "this is what I got" paragraph. The most outstanding thing is probably that I got a new desk chair for my new computer (which I still have not switched my files over to). Six new CDs: Panic! At The Disco's Too Weird to Live Too Rare to Die, Rise Against's End Game, Sleeping with Sirens' Feel, and Green Day's CD trio, Uno, Dos, and Tre. A green sweater that's super cozy and I wear it all of the time (I'm wearing it right now). A jewelry box which I still have yet to organize my jewelry into. Pokemon X, which I've been playing non-stop for the past few days (I've only just now gotten around to cracking it open). Fuschia lipstick (think Nicki Minaj). Pylon orange and sunshine yellow pants (which I fucking LOVE). Clarification on the last three items:

^this kinda pink but maybe a little brighter^

^these are the pants, they are brighter in person^

So yeah that's Christmas and stuff.

New Years was kind of a huge fucking mess. Basically, on the 30th around midnight, Rose had a bit of a medical emergency. We spent six and a half hours on the phone, from 12:15 to 6:45. There was a lot of crying, mostly on my end. I ended up not going to bed for a bit and crying myself to sleep at 7:30 in the morning. Got a text from her at around 8:30 telling me she was going to the hospital, and another around 10:30 saying she was checking in. I couldn't get to sleep after that, I was balling my eyes out again, so I went on Tumblr until my parents came in around 11:30 to wake me up. I explained the situation, the emergency, how we'd been on the phone all night, how my cell phone was entirely depleted of minutes and that ring around 5:15 was us switching to the house phone after my cell ran out... They sent me back to bed and I had another good cry before sleeping until around 4:30, when I was awoken by another text from Rose telling me that she was out of the hospital and would not be staying in overnight care as we suspected would most likely be the case.

Went downstairs, had something to eat, chilled for a little bit. Did my makeup and got dressed up in my nice party dress for 7:00, when guests were supposed to arrive. Rose was supposed to come to the New Year's party, but nobody could have predicted what happened the night before, so she was still recuperating and was unable to attend. Guests started arriving twenty minutes late. We played Super Smash Bros most of the evening, so that wasn't so bad. Thing is, most of the guests had left by 10:30, to dash off to other parties or because they were tired, in the case of my grandparents. Quite a few people just didn't come at all. By that point it was just two of my cousins and my two uncles, which was incredibly disheartening because it would have made the evening a lot more comforting to be surrounded by family. The house felt empty. I played Sims 3 with my younger cousin previously mentioned from sleepovers where we've played Sims into the early hours of the morning.

Midnight was the worst. When the clock struck twelve, and everyone was shouting Happy New Year, I just really wanted to fucking cry. I'm lucky I didn't just burst into tears right then and there. All I could think about was how I'd imagined this evening for months (that's just how fucking long Rose and I were looking forward to this, since she wasn't allowed to come the year before): my whole family crowded in the living room just like every other year, everyone laughing and having fun, counting down from ten loud and clear together, shouting Happy New Year and clinking out little plastic glasses of fake champaigne, my cousins laughing and teasing Rose and I about sharing a New Year's kiss... And then I looked around at the four house guests left, and I felt Rose's absence so strongly, and the events of the night before hit me like a fucking train, and all I wanted to do was cry.

That night, going to bed at 1:30, I knew that if I went to bed then I'd cry myself to sleep, so I ended up staying up until around 5:00 on Tumblr to distract myself before going to bed. Of course I ended up crying a little anyways, how could I not, but yeah.

That was my New Years.

January's been pretty good overall though. Rose is recovering very well from her incident. I did my last exam today, so that's pretty fuckin' swell. I'm so glad to have first semester over and done with, it was a bit of a mess. As my parents so dutifully pointed out to me, almost all of my major assignments were handed in late on an extension this semester, and I took a day off to complete quite a few. My marks are really great though, I'm pretty proud of them. Well, my English mark plummeted from last year and I'm disappointed about that, but I think the last couple of projects for the year and my exam should round it up to a nice number. Next semester I have gym first period, computer sciences second period, lunch, and a two-credit co-op. My placement is going to be at a children's art studio, so I'm super excited to get started.

If you haven't already guessed by now, Rose and I are still a very, very happy couple. Nine-and-a-half months strong. Valentine's Day is coming up, and I have no idea what to do. I want to talk to Rose and see just what her standpoint on the holiday is, 'cause I think it's kinda bullshit (Why the fuck do we need a special day to do something nice to show our partner that we love them? If you aren't doing nice shit without the extra push y'all gotta take a step back and reevaluate.). We should be planning something special around that time anyways since the day after Valentine's Day is our ten month anniversary, but yeah, I'll chat with her and see what's up.

I guess that's all? Yeah, lots of shit gone down and all that. I'm really proud of my art ISU, and I want to post some pics of it on here as soon as I get it back. Also, I will hopefully have some screenshots to put up soon. I want to get in some simming time now that I finally have a worry-free weekend for the first time in a while.

Ta ta for now I guess?
~BookyGirl16~

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