Sep 16, 2012

Lesbian Things

This is going to be a post about various lesbian things.

Last Friday was my brother's birthday, so on Saturday we had a family birthday party. As with all family parties, the following subject came up multiple times, all of those times brought up by my relatives: boys. "Do you have a boyfriend? "Are there any cute boys at your school?" "Are you guys gossiping about boys?" All of those phrases are stated in a teasing and playful manor. And I really feel like answering each of those statements with "I am a lesbian please shut the fuck up thank." But I can't. So instead I reside to answering "No" while my two knowing cousins laugh their bloody asses off. Unrelated: My cousin's daughter (seven months old) fell asleep on me. It was very adorable.

In news of school, I've been talking to Tom a lot lately, which is nice because I thought he hated me. There's a catch though. As usual, since Tom is a boy, my friends have started teasing me about us being together, and that pisses me off to no end. I first got word of this when Friend A showed me a text Friend B sent her that literally read "Caitlin has a bootyfriiiiieeeeeeeeeeend." After that I was pretty much like "We aren't a thing and I kinda hope we never do become a thing because Imalesbian." All one word. Imalesbian. There were a couple seconds and then Friend A just starts smiling and goes "I call bullshit, you only said that when you had to." I explained to them that I didn't really talk about it before because "I didn't want you guys to treat me differently." But they still don't believe me. They aren't treating me any differently now, but that's both a blessing and a curse. They aren't treating me any differently because they are in denial of what I have told them. So yeah, I'm pissed as fuck right now and I'm probably going to try and bring it up at lunch tomorrow. I was discussing this with Rose on the phone tonight, and she was surprised that no one had guessed it yet. I'm certainly not the most obvious about it, but she knew I was a lesbian even before I knew.

The third subject of lesbian news: The L Word. I started watching it at the beginning of September and I am now half way through season two. I haven't watched an episode in a while, so I really want to hop on that after posting this, but it's getting kind of late. Anyway, the show itself is pretty good. The plot is awesome. There are some sex scenes but they aren't really that good. They seem pretty staged. My favorite part is probably that they show lesbians from every walk of life, it's not just a bunch of super butch girls fucking each other all the time (although it's impossible to not include that archetype, and that's pretty much Shane). They show monogamous relationships with Bette and Tina, bisexuality with Alice, closeted lesbian with a terrible gaydar with Dana, the extraordinarily sexually confused with Jenny, and I don't even know where to start with Marina I really fucking hate her okay I don't even know who the fuck she's supposed to be but she's just a cold-hearted bitch seriously I just can't even I really do not like her.

Fourth and final topic of lesbianism is that Rose recently got a cell phone and we exchanged numbers over the phone tonight. She texted me her number and the text literally read "Pussy." So I texted her back "Fleshy taco" and I plan on randomly texting her another vagina nickname some time during the day tomorrow. I literally googled "vagina nickanmes" to try and find a list and with the first link I hit the motherload. Like seriously jesus tits that is a lot of thingies. I plan on texting her one every day until I run out :)

And that's all for now. Lesbiantastic. I'm off to squeeze in another episode of The L Word.

Yours in pussy-loving,



  1. I hope your friends start to believe you, and they accept it! If they don't, well, they aren't very good friends, are they?

    1. They've pretty much accepted by now, methinks OuO

  2. Good Lord, woman! I agree with Gorgon, although I think they'll come around and accept you. They might use humor as some sort of defense mechanism. Haven't seen you around in awhile, hope all is well with you!

    1. Yeah, they've come around ^.^ Thanks for the concern, shit's goin' prety good over here :) I just made another post highlighting everything.